Waking up to my life, getting unstuck, and finding my health and happiness did not happen with a snap of a finger. My journey from being stuck in my goals to creating a vision that allows me to stick to achieving and maintaining my health and happiness is a daily practice I enjoy.
The Secret Language of Birthdays declares my birthday as The Day of Dogged-Persistence. Hindsight says, this is true!
My tendency is to allow my dogged-persistence to get me stuck. It has my entire life. I am very determined and when I set a goal, I achieve it. The goal is the goal, regardless. I put on blinders, hunker down and get to it. Yes, that can be good but it comes at a cost. My blinders can be too effective. In the past, I did not think about a big picture or have a vision. I knew nothing of adjusting my goal and learning from my experiences. Now, I believe that is what life is about. Live each day. Enjoy successes and learn from experiences. Adjust as you need to. Constantly change. Pay attention.
I grew up believing that when you set a goal, you achieve it. Not a bad way to grow up. I won’t go into the details of my youth. Let’s just say my grades were good, my parents never had to worry, and I don’t have wild stories to tell from high school or college.
Jumping ahead to 2000 I was married to a great guy and I had a great job and great
friends. I was completing my thesis for my second Masters degree. But I woke up many nights thinking … This is not my life! It was not a bad life but it wasn’t right for me. I was stuck and I did not know how to get out … this was what I have been working toward. This was the goal, right? I reached the goal, but I was stuck. This was the beginning of waking up and realizing there is more to life than reaching goals. Sadly, my marriage ended (that will always hurt). I finished the masters course work but I did not complete my thesis. I learned that success is not always about what you acquire but it may be achieved by letting go. That was a huge lesson!
I wish that was the end of my learning journey. It was tough but only the beginning. There would be lots more letting go. Fast forward 2013ish … I am stuck. I had a good paying job. I was in a relationship with a great guy. I ran almost daily and my yoga practice was strong. I owned an adorable home. Again, here’s the “but”. I was often saying “Once I get through this, everything will be better. That’s when I will be happy.” The this I was “getting through” was my life. As far as I know, I only get one life and I was not living it. I was enduring it. The relationship of four plus years had a mutual ending. I resigned from my global, corporate position of nine years.
With time, I began a new relationship and a new job. I wish I could tell you my life was all roses. Nope, not yet, doggedly-persistent and obviously a slow learner. The new relationship and job were learning experiences and not the stuff of dreams. Relationship lasted a few months. Job … let’s just say we did not part on good terms. I was payed-off to leave. Can’t say anything else because I signed a contract saying I would never speak of it. I think that says enough. The good news, I was much faster at getting unstuck. I set a record, under a year.
Fast forward … Poe Wellness Solutions. With years experience at being stuck, it was time for a change. The timeline for acknowledging my stuckness was shorter. That was a plus but I knew I could do better. My passion for health of mind and body, years of yoga practice and health coaching experience became tools for developing the process for transforming stuckness into stickiness. I am no longer intertwined with my goals. Yes, I have goals. But they are no longer the driving force. They are no longer the end. My goals are the milestones along the way. Now, I have a bigger picture. A vision that matters to me, a purpose, a passion. It took time to create and it needs tending to. My vision provides direction and motivation, a stickiness that keeps me on track. I experience success. I fall short. I learn. I keep moving. I am not stuck on the achievement of my goals but instead motivated by the stickiness of the bigger picture, passion and purpose of my life.
The happy ending? I don’t see an ending. It’s an evolution, a continuous transformation from stuck to sticky.